Sunday School Breakthrough

I had lunch with Mrs. Janet on Friday and so much enjoyed it. She gives me hope and encouragement. :) We talked about all that had happened that week, including my amazing experience with getting a perfect word from God on Sunday night. (I blogged about it....titled "Feeling Alone".) Saturday night, she text me and asked if I would mind sharing that in Sunday School, that she thought I should and that it would be a great start for me opening up. I prayed about it and decided that if the chance came up, I would.

Sunday morning came and I sat in Sunday School...waiting. Janet started the lesson and it was about 'when you get discouraged, do you go to the Lord or to "other idols".? (It seemed like she made that lesson just for me.) I knew that I would be saying what had happened. I was still feeling really nervous and anxious, thinking that maybe there was a slight chance that I didnt have to say anything, that maybe Mrs. Janet would forget...ha ha ha. Then Mrs. Janet said "I had lunch with Miranda this week and she told me about a discouraging experience she had and the amazing word she got from God, and I was hoping that she would share that with us this morning." I said, yes I will....and right then at that moment I got hot and flustured.

The second I started talking was the second I started crying. I hadn't expected to cry. I had prayed about God giving me the courage to speak up but crying never crossed my mind. I can write a blog about it and not cry....but speaking to a group of people who have what I want so badly was MUCH harder than I thought.

I had practiced what I would say but forgot all of it. I had points I wanted to make but cant remember if I made them. I saw a few friends with tears in their eyes and that made it touch my heart even more. I tried to explain why I felt dicouraged and the great word God gave me, but not sure if I did. You see, I was shaking inside and when I was done talking, I couldnt remember what all I had said. 

After that, I was super emotional during Sunday School and service. When Mrs. Janet said the closing prayer for us, she prayed for Brandon. And yep, you guessed it...I cried like a desperate child of God. 

My Sunday School class is full of amazing people. This is has opened a door to my heart. Right now it seems like a very heavy door; it certainly take some effort to open. But will TOTALLY BE WORTH IT!!!

So, thank you to all who listened to my crying, mess of a story. I hope it was understandable. Thank you for the encouraging words (Meagan and Julie), they mean a lot to my heart.

I originally titled this blog "Sunday School Breakdown" but it wasnt a break down, it was a breakthrough.